Count Dracula goes out for lunch

After a nice game of bat-mington, Count Dracula went for dinner to the Vampire State Building restaurant, taking his blood hound with him.

“Excuse-me, sir” said the doorman as Count Dracula reached the building’s door, “Dogs are not allowed in the building.”

Count Dracula smiled with all his fangs out. “This dog does,” he said “And if anyone asked why you let my dog in, tell them I am a real pain in the neck,” he added, handing the doorman a $100 bill tip.

Happily, he continued to the restaurant and waited to be seated.

“Will you be ordering now sir?” asked the waiter, offering the menu.

 “In a moment,” answered Count Dracula, “I am expecting a friend.”

 “Would you like a drink while you wait, sir”

“Yes, a bloody Mary would be nice”

 A few moments later, his friend arrived.

 “I can’t stay long, just sneaked out for a coffin break,” he said, sitting down.

“Don’t worry, your boss is a little batty, he won’t notice anything, Let’s have lunch we have lots to discuss” answered Count Dracula.

 “Will you be ordering now sir?” asked the waiter

 “Hmm…, let’s see,” answered Count Dracula, peering at the menu. “We’ll have scream of tomato soup for starters.”

“May I recommend you our steak, sir? It is particularly nice today.” said the waiter.

“Please, spare me the stake,” answered Count Dracula “Bring us your foccacia. Is made out of self-raising dead, isn’t?”

“Most certainly, sir,” answered the waiter, “The most scrumptious self-raising bread in town, if I may so.”

“Yes, yes,” cut Count Dracula, “Just make it fast, will you, we do not have much time.”

“So, are we going to the Isle of Fright this week-end,” asked the friend.

“Sure, the blood vessels are being readied for us, we leave at dusk,” answered count Dracula cutting his foccacia in bite size pieces.

“Do you know who will be coming?” asked the friend.

 “Pretty much all my blood relations,” answered Count Dracula, smacking his lips. “Are you bringing anybody?”

 “I was planning on inviting Charles, but he became a neck-romancer and only cruises at dawn now. I met a crypt writer last week though, could I bring her along.”

 “Well, you know me, am an eternal bat-chelor, but I’ll be happy to dance fang-dango with her if you don’t mind.” Answered Count Dracula, glancing at the menu again. “What will you have for desert? Blood-oranges and neck-tarine salad or leeches and cream with vein-illa ice cream?”

 “I’ll just have a de-coffin-ated” answered the friend.